![]() I’m starting a new chapter of life in rural Ecuador, and she’s committed to being in Chicago. The difficult truth is, even though we’ve been together three years now, I genuinely don’t know whether she’ll be happy with me. I want Kailey to be happy just as much as I want Reiman to be happy, and I don’t just want her to be happy with me I want her to be happy, period. I realized what True Love is, and that I truly love Kailey, when I realized how much I truly want Kailey to be happy. In reality, the exact opposite is the truth. We’re taught that it’s somehow a virtue to believe that another person “completes us,” and a dysfunction to feel so whole that we’re fulfilled being alone. In America and modernity, we listen to top-40 pop songs and watch romcoms that bastardize love, perverting it into something akin to attachment, and calling it “true” if one’s feelings of wanting (or worse, “needing”) the object of his “love” are strong enough. Previously, I didn’t understand love, and neither did the American culture in which I grew up. ![]() I’ve never known a love so boundary-smashing, transcendent and true, and in fact, it’s the love Kailey and I share that has taught me what True Love actually is. ![]() Three years ago, I met the woman I love more deeply than I ever imagined to be humanly possible.
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